Dani Stone

I Hear Laugh Tracks


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You Can’t Try Out If You Don’t Go In – Why I Never Shook The Poms

My son recently auditioned for a singing part in Rock Band, the extracurricular middle school activity that begins tomorrow. He’s already in Jazz band, Choir and knows he’ll be seated prominently at the drum set when Rock Band begins but he wants it all. The Phil Collins of Rock Band, the drummer who anchors the performance while simultaneously belting out lyrics that will have the audience chanting, “Su-Su-Sussudio.” Can anyone tell me what that song was about? Almost 15 years later and it’s the earworm I still sing along to yet have no idea what I’m actually saying.

class of 89

Me rockin’ some high-waist jeans with my friend, Shelley E on graduation night.

At 12 years old I admire his pluck. Sure, it’s the same pluck that often has me pulling my hair out and asking myself what I did in my youth to deserve his pluck-ing nonsense but as my husband often says, I’d rather have a kid with character than one we have to pull out of his shell.

As parents we never know what kind of impact we’ll have on our children and to be honest, that scares the hell out of me. If they inherit my ability to face adversity with an inappropriate joke or their father’s knack for numbers – fantastic. However, if they learn to eat their feelings like their mother or see life from a pessimistic slant like my husband, then we could be creating a couple of hot messes right now.

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“Please Don’t Be Such a Creeper” – How My Son Says Good Morning

jakie crib cropThis morning I had to rouse my son early, well, early by summer vacation standards. I sat carefully on the edge of his bed so as not to startle him, then gently shook the lump that was snoring soundly under the blanket.

“Good morning, sweetheart,” I chirped. “We need to go shopping for Dadoo’s birthday and maybe pick up a few school supplies, remember?”

He groaned, flipped over on his back and within seconds, the snoring continued.

Instead of waking him up again right away, I sat in the filtered sunlight and looked at the face of my sleeping boy, though at 12 years old, he’s starting to look, and certainly smell like more of a manchild.

His bed sits in the same place his crib sat all those years ago. Instead of stuffed animals, a colorful mobile and small blue blanket, his headboard now contains Lego pieces, an MP3 player, Rick Riordan books and his Nintendo DS, which I suppose late at night is the modern equivalent of a colorful mobile. There might be one tattered stuffed animal hidden in the corner of his bed, just for old time’s sake. But you didn’t hear that from me.

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Video – Listen To Your Mother 2013

Remember in May when I yammered on and on about being chosen for the Kansas City cast of Listen To Your Mother? Then I yammered on about how great the show was? Well, for those of you who couldn’t attend, the videos are up!! Yay. *flop sweat* So now you can see what all the excitement and yammering was about.

My video is below. I did manage to look at my Dougie at the end, and I held back the ugly-faced cry as long as I could.

Sincere thanks to –

Producers Erin Margolin and Laura Seymour for allowing me the chance to tell Katie’s story.

My Dougie for being my rock, and also the OCD yin to my flighty yang.

Buck Sommerkamp for shooting a video that only highlighted one of my chins.

Lisa, Sarah, Greta, Molly, Michelle, Jen, Julie, Rita, Sarah, Ashley and Leslie for being the instant sisterhood I needed to get on the stage, open  my mouth and make the words come out. You are – Once in my life, forever in my heart. If I got tattoos I would totally tattoo that but instead, just imagine the phrase winding around my ankle or scrawled across my chest.

To see videos of the other beautiful strong women I shared the stage with that night, Click HERE, then scroll down till you see “Listen To Your Mother – Kansas City 2013” (next to the last row). Grab some popcorn and more than one tissue.


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Remembering Joyland

Recently, I read the new book by Stephen King, Joyland. I was attracted to the promise of a story that was King-Light (now, with half the gore of a traditional Stephen King novel). I was also intrigued by the premise of a murder mystery with a hint of the supernatural. The review appears today on Book End Babes.

Joyland1-300x300When I read that the story took place in a fictitious amusement park named, Joyland, I thought, “But it’s not fictitious, it’s real. Or, at least it was.” Many years ago, Joyland was a thriving park in my hometown of Wichita, Kansas. I became so nostalgic I thought, “I should write about my beloved Joyland,” but then I remembered, wait, I already did.

This post originally appeared on the Wichita lifestyle website VerbICT in April 2010. It has been slightly edited and updated. 

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You Could Eat Off Our Pool, But The Colonel Would Not Approve

A few days ago, I wrote a post where I lamented about my son’s lackadaisical summer attitude, his obsession with Minecraft and how, due to financial burdens, we would be staycationing at Stone Casa this year. Thankfully, now we can add, “frolic in the water” to our list of frivolity options because the pool is UP, people. The pool is up and prepped and Dougie has finally given us the green light to enter.  Isn’t that AWESOME? Wait, I’m sensing you don’t realize what a big deal this is. Clearly, you don’t know what goes into the annual “raising of the pool.” No one does, really, except The Colonel.*

*In case you’re new here, The Colonel is the loving endearment for my husband when he’s being a little extra type-A. It’s okay. He knows it, accepts it and often refers to himself in the third person by using this moniker.

A few days ago I posted this message on Twitter:

If you build it, they will come. . .

If you build it, they will come. . .

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Minecraft and the Not-So-Busy Bummer Summer

j k ducks crop  resize “Summertime. . . and the livin’ is easy. . . “

If you immediately started singing the lyrics to that song you’re either a George Gershwin fan, over the age of 50 or a fan of every reality singing competition ever made. Countless hopeful starlets have destroyed this classic tune in the hopes of becoming the winner of America’s Next Top Voice Talent X Factor Idol.

Much to my chagrin, this has also become the theme song to my son’s 12th summer. While I’m in favor of letting my children relax and enjoy the fruits of their educational labor, there’s got to be some balance. Unfortunately, we’re having trouble finding that right now.

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Mama Knows

Karen Ledford Photography

Karen Ledford Photography

Last weekend I was a cast member in the inaugural Kansas City production of Listen To Your Mother. Last weekend I did something I’ve never done. I walked up to a lectern, which is like a podium but without the body-hiding security of wood panels, and told a story about my daughter. How I knew something was terribly wrong with her after she was born but no one would listen to me. How I shouted and shrieked and pointed to her little face where veins were beginning to sprout like a road map and the darkness under her eyes was becoming so noticeable, someone actually accused me of child abuse. How she almost wasn’t diagnosed in time. How we found help and encouragement from angels among us. How we sought treatment in New York, and the best part, how Katie beat insurmountable odds to be here with us today.

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My Kitchen Needs A Mop and a Good Exorcism

Isn’t it funny how the ebb and flow of life can take you from happiness to irritation in just a few short minutes. And of course by funny I don’t mean funny-HAHA, I mean funny-OH COME ON YOU’VE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME WITH THIS.

One minute you’re with your daughter petting a pot-bellied pig and looking at the hairless ass of a hand-size tarantula sitting in Tupperware and the next minute you come home to find your husband behind the refrigerator cursing like he’s in a Quinton Tarantino movie. We’ve all been THERE, right? No? Okay, sorry. Quick recap.

Evidently the tarantula does something to his booty hair when he's stressed out. HELLO? You're the tarantula, dude!

Evidently the tarantula does something to his booty hair when he’s stressed out. HELLO? You’re the tarantula, dude!

Last Thursday I joined my daughter’s Girl Scout troop on a field trip to visit The Bug Lady where we saw the creepy Tupperware tarantula (pictured) and also watched The Lady Bug mascot, a pot bellied pig, lumber around the room and chew on all the rugs. Good times had by all. Then we dodged hail stones through a spring thunderstorm until we made it back home. That’s where the fun train stopped. Our smiles faded the moment we walked in the door.

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Kansas Women Bloggers and Next Left Summer Cover

To say the last two months have been crazy would be an understatement.

This post is not so much a new epiphany of thoughts and feelings or even a cute post about my children or my Dougie, though, come on, seriously, how adorable is this little Girl Scout?

katie dog n shakeOr this birthday boy whom we bribed to wear the sombrero even though he felt like a, “lumping idiot.” Lumping is his new boundary-pushing curse word. I find myself saying it now. Quality parenting. 2013-04-03_17-57-18_470

Or these three precious faces snuggling on Saturday morning. You know what they say, “the family who plays WordFeud, Pokemon and Fruit Ninja together, stays together.”

fam electronics crop

Nope, this post is actually a recap of goodness, the introduction to a new blogging community and a chance to show you the new summer cover of my e-book, Next Left.

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Why I Auditioned for Listen To Your Mother

badge-2013A few weeks ago I wrote about my audition for LTYM (Listen To Your Mother) but there were so many things going on that week including the passing of my uncle and a possessed dishwasher that decided to spew forth water with the voracity of that poor child from the Exorcist that I didn’t give the story the attention it deserved.

Since that time, I’ve learned that I did, in fact, make it in to the big show. Yay! My reaction? Joy, tears and gratitude followed by flop sweat, nerves, the desire to lose 20 pounds and I may have even peed just a teeny tiny bit. ‘Cause this thing, folks, is a big deal.

What is Listen To Your Mother? From the official website: “Celebrating Mother’s Day with a national series of original live-readings shared on local stages and via social media.” Each show is individually produced and all the shows are performed in May. This year, 24 cities will be participating. Through generous sponsors and ticket sales, a portion of the proceeds from each show will go to a local charity. On Saturday, May 11th, I’ll be speaking at the show in Kansas City at Unity Temple on the Plaza. For more information or to buy tickets, click HERE.

Speaking. I’ll be. . . speaking. *gulp*

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